PEOPLE WHOM I REFUSE TO TRUST
Grown ass adults who still use ‘u’ and ‘ur’
Those who say ‘Oh’ instead of ‘Zero’
Guys who wink.
Those who don’t dash their sevens and Z’s.
Gentlemen who do not own properly tailored clothes.
Dudes who won’t put the toilet seat down.
People who use motorized salt and pepper shakers.
PHRASES THAT NEED TO BE RETIRED YESTERDAY
‘I appreciate you.’
‘Facts.’
‘Hangry.’
‘That’s lit.’
‘Circle back.’
‘I’m here for it.’
GARLIC BREAD > SEX
MISS ME WITH THE FOLLOWING
Mayonnaise
Stevia
Truffle Oil
Food reaction videos.
THINGS THAT ARE OVERRATED
Waygu beef
Parsley
Chocolate
WAFFLES > PANCAKES > FRENCH TOAST
LATKES > MASHED POTATOES > TATER TOTS